Love Like Jesus

Family Blog, February 2026

Brian Van Doren

Hey Second Family,

It’s February, so I have decided to write about the super original and non-cliche topic of love. All kidding aside, love really is an amazing thing. The most ardent unbelievers and hardened atheists recognize its unique importance and fall prey to its power. Mankind of every background and culture finds itself agreeing that love is good. As Christians, we know that love is good, because genuine love comes from God, because God is love. We also know that not everything that the world calls “love” is genuine love. There is a right kind of love and a wrong kind of love. A godly, righteous love and a worldly, selfish love. This is part of the reason why Jesus tells His disciples in John 13:34, “a new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another.”

Why is it important to love the way Jesus loves us? The bible teaches very clearly that we are to love our neighbors as ourselves (Lev. 19:18, Matt. 22:39) So, why can’t we just love each other the way we love ourselves? Why do we need the example of Christ and the empowering of the Holy Spirit (Gal. 5:22-26, 2 Tim. 1:7) to love each other rightly? Well, part of the answer is because we don’t even love ourselves rightly.

Think about it; we all love ourselves, but with a sinful, distorted, and self-centered love (Is. 64:6). We do not love ourselves rightly. If we did, then we would always choose to do the things that are ultimately best for us, even when they are difficult and painful. But we do not love ourselves rightly enough to do what is best for ourselves. Many times our love for ourselves is so distorted by sin that we choose to do things that give instant gratification but lead to ultimate ruin. Even when we know the outcome is destruction, our love is so twisted in our flesh that we often still choose what is bad for us. And if we love others in that same way, then our “love” will simply aid them in choosing their own destruction as well.

But that is not how God loves us. God loves us enough to do what is best for us. Sometimes it costs us something when God works to bring about what is best for us. But He has shown that He loves us enough that He is willing to do what it takes to bring about what is best for us, even when it costs Himself greatly. This is most clearly seen in the gospel. The Son of God humbled Himself and became a man (Phil. 2:7-8), lived a sinless life of suffering (Heb. 4:15, Is. 53:3), was tortured and killed on the cross, received the wrath of the Father to pay for sins (Is. 53:10, Rom. 3:25, 2 Cor. 5:21, Gal. 3:13), and was raised to life on the third day. He did all of that because it is what we needed in order to have life. He paid the highest price of any of us to secure what is best for us. That is genuine love.

The answer to our distorted love is not to simply love ourselves more. It is to embrace Christ’s holy and perfect love for us in the gospel. It is to receive God’s love and to love Him in return. When we turn from sin and receive Christ as Savior and Lord, He reorients our hearts and produces the love of God within us. In Christ, we have a love for God and can love like God. As we abide in Jesus, He enables us through the Spirit to love others the way that He has loved us. Through the Spirit, we can choose what is best for us and for others. We can put others before ourselves and serve them instead of expecting to be served. All we have to do is abide in His love (John 14:9)

The only way to love like Jesus is to be transformed to love God first. All love flows from Him. We will never love ourselves or others rightly until our hearts have been changed to first love God. Praise the Lord that He has loved us enough to make that possible through Jesus Christ our Lord! May we all abide in His love.